The Big 40 and My Stubborn Refusal
I turned 40 in December 2019.
It’s still not an event I’m embracing — and we’re in 2025. There’s been no big “welcome to midlife” party, no graceful acceptance. Honestly, there’s more of an absolute refusal, the kind a horse gives when you lead it to water and it simply won’t drink.
So this year, I started off with a dramatic declaration:
“Everything must go.”
Not just the usual New Year’s Resolutions. More. Deeper.
And quietly, I wondered: Can I give 40 away too?
Maybe not on my passport.
But perhaps — in the way I live — yes.
If that’s the case then the thinking that I have to define my age, also needed to go.
When a Gazelle Passed Me
On a recent run in the park, a woman who looked about twice my age cantered past me as if I were standing still — gazelle versus hedgehog (or elephant even).
I’m not suggesting I’m a hedgehog although I did feel like it at the time. What struck me almost immediately, however, and more so than ever before, was the thought that, actually, age doesn’t really matter.
I’m extremely fortunate to be blessed with a great number of friends, many of whom are men and women in their fifties, sixties, and seventies who are active, energetic, and downright gorgeous. They study, they exercise, they work, they run, they horse ride, they date, they travel and the ladies wear red lipstick that would make Channel proud.
Question Everything (Especially Age)
The more I see of the world, the more I think we need to question what we believe to be true.
Remember when “low fat, high carb” was all the rage? Now it’s a total no-no. I’m not saying you need to go paleo — but it shows how “truth” changes.
And while I am talking about what you eat, I’m also speaking proverbially:
age-wise, money-wise, work-wise.
Whilst I am talking about what you eat, I’m ALSO talking proverbially; age-wise, money-wise, work-wise…. Yes, the year you were born dictates how old you are on paper.
But how you choose to live? That part is yours.
How to Live FULLY Post Mid Life?
First, and I mean this! Embrace the midlife crisis! Embrace it! If you’re going to do a mid-life crisis, do it properly! I bought a motorbike. My friend Jesus (name changed) courageously got divorced from his marriage that hadn’t worked in over 10 years.
Go and live! Fully! We’re all going to die, so you may as well live.
And on that note give yourself a medal too! Adulting is not the easiest of games and if you’ve got this far, you deserve one too! Keep shining and have a POWER week!
