The word ‘manifest’ has, in the past, made me want to gag. The whole ‘manifest your dream life’ by imagining it just never worked for me.
But I do have some experience with how to bring dreams to life and I wanted to share them here.
Firstly, know this (and I have learnt this the hard way), it’s essential to pursue your dreams but not chase them.
What do I mean?
I mean that every day you should be taking steps in the direction of your dreams.
But that doesn’t mean compromising
- yourself
- your health
- wellbeing
- family
- or values
Any dream that compromises any one of those, isn’t a dream worth having.
3 Steps to Manifesting Your Dreams
1. Know what you want
Seems obvious no?
How can you manifest a dream if you don’t know what you want. But sometimes this is tough. We spend alot of time in situations we don’t want, to learn what we do.
2. Do the thing!
Okay, you actually have to show up to class. I mean it. If you want to get in shape, you’ll need to exercise. Or if you want to learn a new language, you’ll need to go to class.
Whatever the thing, you’ll have to show up and do it. The more you do it, the easier it gets and the more likely you are to develop a habit of getting better at that specific thing.
3. Surrender
Okay. You know what you want. You’re showing up every day and doing it. Now what?
Now you surrender.
What is for you is for you. You cannot MAKE yourself famous. You cannot MAKE a dream relationship come to life. You can’t force things is what I’m saying.
Give them their space and time.
Surrender. Let go.
Sounds easy – for people like me, it’s the hardest thing in the world!
Tips to Manifesting Your Dream Life
Living your best life does NOT mean what social media would have you believe. Often (and trust me, I’ve tried) it isn’t the influencer style millions of followers feed.
It means being truly honest with yourself about what you want.
Also these 3 tips seem to have helped me alot
- Have dreams in your heart, but live for today
- Focus on habits not outcome
- Be human
Have dreams in your heart but live for today
The problem I have with the whole #LiveYourBestLife story is that it’s unrealistic, depending on your interpretation. Often the interpretation, if Instagram (and trust me you’d think it by looking at my Insta feed) is anything to go by, is that this means travel, a great body, first class food etc etc. It’s just not realistic and it’s too much bloody pressure; eat perfectly, make money, keep in shape… blah blah blah. Of course, we all want those things, but I think in the pursuit of them, we miss life.
At least I have in the past and now Living my Best Life means a quick drive to the shops with my dad, coffee with my mates, dinner with my family, going to work, ice cream and a good book. That’s a great life right there. Yes, I want many more things, but not at the cost of those priceless treasures.
How easy it is to miss the small but big things in pursuit of the big but small things.
The thing is, and I was recently chatting to international speaker Dennis Heijn on this recently, as he’s written a piece about luck being as significant a factor in reaching your dreams as hard work is. What I’ve come to realise is that the truth is that I’m not / you’re not in charge of the luck department. Read more on this great piece here.
What is the difference between goals and dreams?
The differences between dreams, goals, and a life plan, with the caveat that not many of my plans have ever gone according to plan.
- A dream is just that; it’s a desire in your heart that may or may not come true due to an array of factors that need to come together in order to make it so.
- A goal is something that you can work towards, given certain steps you can take.
For example, my dream is to go to Italy (I lived this dream of going in 2023 with my mom and my sister – and it came to life almost by magic). 
A goal is something you want to strive for. It’s generally in your power, although maybe a litte out of reach because you think it’s beyond your capacity.
Focus on (REALISTIC) Habits
If you want a dream to come to life, you need to do things that are in line with the dream coming to life. In some cases, this is obvious. Don’t go to Italian classes if your dream is to learn German. Simple enough.
Forget New Year’s resolutions, I always say. Focus on Habits!
I always love what James Clear says….
What 1 habit if you implemented every day, a year from now would change your life?
I make sure I train at least 4 days a week and try to save 10% of my salary each month. These are in line with my goals.
Whether the stars align and I can achieve my dream to buy my dad a ticket to a Liverpool game is another story.
“We’re trained to be outcomes driven, but being habit driven is a far greater determiner of success”
What It Means to Pursue a Dream, Not Chase it
I truly think we have more anxiety in society than ever before. The word can be crazy and scary. We live high-pressure lives. Do we really need habits that just up the ante? The wise answer I think is not if it’s going to kill us.
I’ve also failed a number of times, and honestly, if I can spare you the pain, then that’ll make me happy. So my friends hold dreams in your hearts, but as to the realisation of the dream, well, as my dad always says
“Lisa, let gravity to God and the universe”.
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