Where would you be in the story if your life were a movie or a book?
- What IS the story about?
- What is your character’s next move?
- How does your character triumph?
So often we get stuck in our stories. Life is challenging… and don’t get me wrong, it is. But we can change our stories.
How to Write Your Life Story
Well firstly you should know that this is a post about your life, although once you figure out your life story, you may want to write a book.
When you hear “writing your life story,” you might think of memoirs, autobiographies, or carefully penned diaries. But what if your life story could be as simply as writing down what turn you want to take next.
Or rather, if you were viewing your character from the outside, what’s the magic turn in the tale.
With the world being as crazy as it is, we don’t believe in stories anymore. AI writes all that stuff. Except it doesn’t.
The Future is Human – I do truly believe that and we have a choice about how this story goes.
Write. Then Edit, Often.
I’m a writer. I’ve written easily over 10 books in my life – most of which have not been worth seeing the light of day but it doesn’t matter.
What I’ve learned from the process is that writing (and editing) a book isn’t too different from writing and editing your life – when and where possible.
Just because things have been a certain way your whole life, or for many years, doesn’t mean that they can’t change.
Sometimes, all it takes is a shift. Maybe you lost your job, or you feel heartbroken. Or maybe you simply have been become more aware that you want to live your life more authentically.
Maybe you just get a sense about something. Like it’s time to take up yoga? Or start dance classes? Or maybe it’s time to learn a new language.
Making mistakes is proof you’re trying
We’re often so afraid of making mistakes that we choose to do nothing. We don’t want to fail.
We don’t take up a new activity because we’re too tired. Or we convince ourselves we can’t.
But what if that dance class is where you’re going to meet a new friend? Or discover that you hate dancing. Which is great too because then at least you know what you don’t want.
The Heroes Journey in Real Life
Every story, EVERY story, follows more or less, a hero’s journey – and that includes yours. Without going into a ton of detail, the hero’s journey typically involves a series of specific steps that the hero takes to achieve their goal or complete their quest.
Whilst it’s used for crafting compelling stories, its really not too different from our lives here on planet Earth.
The 12 steps of The Heroes Journey;
There are 12 steps but it always begins with the call to adventure, where the hero is presented with a challenge or opportunity that sets them on their path.
I’m not sure about you but my life hasn’t been short of challenges. And every challenge has asked something new of me.
How does this help? It always helps to know what your challenge is.
What life event is currently asking you to change?
- The call to adventure,
- refusal of the call,
- meeting the mentor,
- crossing the threshold,
- tests, allies, and enemies,
- the approach,
- the ordeal,
- the reward,
- the road back,
- the resurrection,
- the return,
- and the freedom to live.
Can you identify where you are in your story? Have you realised that your current job or relationship isn’t working? Are you in denial (refusing the call)?
Maybe you’ve met a mentor (a therapist or a friend).
Sometimes you can be in a few stages altogether.
A Real-Life Example of a Life Makeover
I have some incredible friends! I could spend a lifetime telling their stories.
There was my friend Jessica who quit her high-powered job on her 40th to become a single mother through IVF. There’s my friend Clarissa who spent two years battling cancer to come out the other side and write a book.
I’m telling you this because if you’re reading this and think it’s the end, it isn’t!
You’re never tool old. And it’s never too late.
Why Become the Author of Your Life?
There are many people who believe EVERYTHING is a choice. I don’t believe that. Sometimes shit happens and no matter what, life throws a curve ball at you.
So then we’re screwed? No, not at all.
You can become more of an author in your life. And sometimes it even helps to look at your character from an outside perspective so you can think more objectively.
If you were writing a book and your character had encountered this particular challenge which you’re experiencing, what would he or she do next?
Great stories inspire, provoke thought, and spark emotion. Why not aim to make your own life—however ordinary it may seem—just as impactful?
Seeing your life as a story can give it coherence, purpose, and excitement.
So How Do You Rewrite Your Life Story?
Whether you’re in a grand change or something small, here are some helpful steps to take to help you rewrite your story IN REAL LIFE;
- Who is your character? Is she/he, something you’ve seen in a movie or book?
- What’s the theme? For example is this a relationship issue? And even within that, what is the theme?
- What are the options for the next steps? So if you were to take a next step, what would it be? It always helps to write down the options you have. We get so used to thinking in a certain way that we feel there aren’t options but there are ALWAYS options.
- What is your character developing through this experience? For example, are you developing self-awareness? Or resilience? Or self-compassion? These are the unseen gifts we often don’t recognize. This is the reward in the hero’s journey.
- Write the ending. If the particular book with your particular challenge, you were writing, were to end, how would it end?
Now if you want to actually write your life story as a book, it isn’t too different.
You will have to plot your chapters more, choose a beginning and an end, and of course think about whether you want to publish it or leave it as a manuscript.
That, of course, is up to you.